Rameau's Review Archive: A Lot Like Love (FBI/US Attorney #2) by Julie James

Originally published April 16th 2012.

Synopsis:
The FBI wants her cooperation.
As the daughter of a billionaire and the owner of the city's top wine store, Jordan Rhodes is invited to the most exclusive parties in Chicago. But there's only one party the FBI wants to crash: the charity fundraiser of a famous restaurateur, who also happens to launder money for the mob. In exchange for her brother's release from prison, Jordan is going to be there—with a date supplied by the Bureau.

Agent McCall just wants her.
As the top undercover agent in Chicago, Nick McCall has one rule: never get personal. This "date" with Jordan Rhodes is merely an assignment— one they're both determined to pull off even if they can't be together for five minutes before the sarcasm and sparks begin to fly. But when Nick's investigation is compromised, he and Jordan have no choice but to pretend they're a couple, and what starts out as a simple assignment begins to feel a lot like something more.



A Lot Like Love by Julie James

Julie James has fallen was pushed stepped down from the pedestal of my unreasonably high expectations. She is, after all, just a woman who writes better contemporary romance novels than most.
This time I knew what to expect. I knew to expect characters that are strong and coherent, and I knew to expect a story that won't surprise me with its twists and turns but will effectively carry through and take the pressure off the romance. I knew to expect something believable--or as believable as the romance genre is capable of offering.

I like how Julie James does her research and how it shows in the daily details of a lawyer or a wine merchant. I like how Jordan teaches Nick about wine, looking at it, and tasting it. What I would have liked even more, if the passion a person or a character feels for his or her trade had shone through the text. For example, when Jordan explains that a wine's age affects its hue, she fails to elaborate how it affects it. For someone who works, lives, and breathes the stuff, that little detail should be clear as day and slip out in everyday discussion whether it bores the none wine enthusiasts or not. I know that when I start explaining physics I won't stop talking and pointing out little details until someone shuts me up or until I reach the limits of my knowledge.

Then there are times when the author should know to shut up. Writing the same word or expression over and over is like repeating a joke after it stops being funny. It's something I can live with, but I doubt it will ever fully stop nagging at me.

I didn't notice this, until Alicia pointed it out to me, but James likes to describe clothing and she likes to do it by saying he wore or she wore a lot. So I can say, there are some perks to not caring about everyday fashion--or fashion at all. Except Crocs. Even I won't wear them.

As to something that didn't affect the plot, but could have, I'm asking:

Why does Nick tell absolutely everyone that he works undercover and why does he tell absolutely everything about those undercover works of his? Telling his family about working undercover is one thing, spoiler telling a random sex buddy is anotherspoiler. The woman's confusion over his last name would have been enough to tip off the private detective, because apparently that was her only function. I wonder how such a blabbermouth survived doing that job for so long.

It's been a while--few days--since I read this book, and I can't think of much more to say. Other than to thank Alicia for recommending it to me. If the next two books I read from Julie James are as good as this, I'll be adding another author on my favourite authors list.

Review: A Lot Like Love by Julie James

Form: pdf format

Genre: romance, contemporary fiction

Target audience: adults

Borrowed from a friend that shouldn't be named.

Why I read it:

I have sadistic friends. Some of them keep borrowing me copies of romantic fiction, especially when I am planning to go away for a day or two. I am a compulsive reader, I am an addict, I read everything, good, bad and ugly and they take advantage. Sometimes I shrug these offers off, sometimes I succumb to them. This one had good reviews on Goodreads so I thought: “why not? A freebie for a dull train trip…it might be actually fun…” Right.

Synopsis:

It is a truth universally acknowledged that that a single woman in a  possession of a good fortune (like several millions and a wine shop not to mention a fine prospect of inheriting more when the daddy kicks the bucket), must be in want of a husband. Or at least a steady boyfriend. Or two. Jordan Rhodes finds herself in such a position – she is incredibly beautiful, young, rich, educated, intelligent, independent, down-to-earth, not spoiled at all and so very conspicuously single you really have to wonder what’s wrong with that girl. Something must be wrong with her, right? Some skeletons in a closet full of Gucci shoes?  It’s not that she has no social life because she has to work 24/7 to feed her twelve illegitimate children and an alcoholic mother, paying off her mortgage all along, right?

Soon you find out. Beware, it is shocking, even heartrending. You see, her twin brother, Kyle, has created a kind of Twitter crisis when his ex-girlfriend  broke off  by posting a  video of herself giving another guy a blowjob. Yuck. Small wonder poor little Kyle hit the roof, hacked into the system and immobilized the whole site for 48 hours or so. Imagine that. No Twitter. How people communicated during that period? Texting? Sign language? Skype? Snail mail, perish the thought? Really, a terrorist attack, nothing less!

Anyway now Kyle, like every other criminally-inclined citizen, is serving his time. As you perhaps know (or maybe not) a prison is not exactly a health spa. Our poor millionaire is being on the brink of mental breakdown, not to mention the fact that his inmates pick on him constantly, (complete dumbasses all of them but they have to be that way so the story continues). When two FBI agents in their government issue dark suits and glasses appear in Jordan’s posh wine shop’s door, offering to release Kyle from prison if Jordan will take an undercover officer to a wine tasting party, she doesn’t feel she has a choice. Not really. You see, she is not only a great girl (see the section above) but she also loves her bro insanely. Aww…

Off she goes to a party organized by a certain Xander Eckhart, a restaurateur who is doing business with gangsters or mafia and secretly nourishes other plans concerning Jordan (guess what). Her partner for the night a.k.a male arm candy is, despite initial complications, a smolderingly handsome undercover agent extraordinaire, Nick McCall. Nick, his manly charms, intelligence and bedroom skills notwithstanding, hasn’t found what he is looking for (U2 anyone?)  in the prospective wife department so he also remains conspicuously single…Awww…two stars collide, angels are singing “All You Need Is Love”, St. Valentine is smiling benignly from one fluffy cloud and white doves are crapping on your car while kissing furiously…sorry, just a daydream.

I am pretty sure even a ten-year old girl playing with her Barbie would know what happened next. It’s always the same old scenario. Jordan and Nick fall for each other. They find they are simply compatible, there is no other word for that. They cannot get enough of…each other of course (pst, pst, yes, they go to bed!). Jordan saves her brother, Nick saves Jordan’s life, the sun is shining, the grapes are ripening in Napa Valley, summertime and the livin’ is easy, fish are jumping and cotton is high, oh your da is rich, your mum is good-looking…wait it’s from another story.

Eh.

What I liked:

Not much. It was a DNF to tell you the truth so perhaps I really appreciated the fact that I could stop reading this book at any given moment and I wasn’t compelled to start it again as if I was a completely normal, addiction-free person. Every cloud has a silver lining. ;)

What I didn’t like:

• The main heroine. She was simply obnoxiously perfect. No women are like her, neither in real life nor in good books. Once again a plastic Barbie doll comes to my mind. A study in pink…
• The main male lead. Nick was so incredibly boring in his special-operative routine that I gagged from time to time. Not to mention the fact that he, supposedly a great FBI agent, never hesitated to reveal his real identity to any of his casual sex partners which created quite a commotion at one point.
• His relationship with Jordan lacked psychological reality. One moment he is such a macho agent with a big black gun who won’t allow any chick take any decisions, billionairess or not,  the next moment he goes meekly on an expensive trip, completely funded by his girlfriend and, sipping a glass of expensive wine, he discusses his FEELINGS for heaven’s sake…when did FBI agents actually acquire feelings?
• The plot. It was so very predictable. I’ve watched and read the same story like I can’t say how many times –certainly enough to make me nauseated at the mere whiff of it.
• The Kyle-in-prison situation was simply artificial and false. Any millionaire would buy his way out of trouble but not Kyle. Why? Saving up for another Maserati? Or rather another Mac?
• The novel contained too much backstory (infodumps et all) to make the plot really fast-flowing and interesting to me even on a completely superficial level. From time to time the well-known landscape outside my window seemed to be far more compelling. A dog barking. A cat scratching its ear. A rat in a dustbin. An old car coughing loudly on the road. Children eating ice-cream. Fascinating stuff, especially when compared to this book!
• No good sense of humour to alleviate my boredom.

Final verdict:

I wouldn’t recommend this Julie James novel to anybody, not even a romance fan, but perhaps it is only me. Ok, I can criticize my own person as well. I know why Anachronist hates romances overall and this story in particular. She is jealous like hell. She will never be a wine-sipping heiress of a  fortune. She will never drive a sports car and date handsome FBI agents. She will never wear a purple dress showing her bare back up to the equally bare bottom cheeks (see the cover) to a party or, in fact, anywhere else. That’s why she hated this book. Not because it was crap. Quod erat demonstrandum. ;)