Reviewing a Classic, Quotes and Notes: The Sheik by E.M. Hull

Form: e-book
Genre: misogynist romantic drama from the previous century ;p
Target audience: women masochists

Introduction: 

Lady Diana Mayo and her older brother, Sir Aubrey Mayo are two perfect examples of British upper class - people with too much money, too much time and too little brains between them. I would call them a Mayo salad gone wrong: completely green (her), rather heavy to digest (him), very pleased with themselves, all form no substance (both of them).

You see, everything is nicely explained in big, stinky infodumps at the beginning: Diana was brought up by Aubrey after the death of their mother during the birth followed by the suicide of her father. Poor Aubrey had no idea how to raise a girl, being a 19-year-old boy at that time and apparently not very bright, so he brought her up as if she was his younger brother. Surprise surprise, the result was such that the girl became spoiled rotten – she smoked, she wore men’s clothes, she did only what she wanted and when she wanted, she was arrogant and she knew everything best. A marriage proposal from a young, kind, conventional gentleman, deeply in love and full of best intentions? Preposterous! Silly! Why would she want to get married at all? Such an attitude, according to Ms. Hull, begs for punishment and punished it will be.


Quotes and Notes:



Let me start with a scene when the siblings are quarreling about Diana’s latest plans how to spend a month without being bored to death by the polite society and its restrictions – she intends to travel alone across the desert with a caravan of Arabs for the whole company. A very foolish idea which doesn't prove Diane's independence but her complete lack of brain and imagination. Still it is her idea so it must be good. She announces:

“I will do what I choose when and how I choose, and I will never obey any will but my own."
Sir Aubrey's eyes narrowed suddenly.
"Then I hope to Heaven that one day you will fall into the hands of a man who will make you obey," he cried wrathfully. Her scornful mouth curled still more scornfully. "Then Heaven help him!" she retorted scathingly, and turned away to her tent.„

As you see Diana is a spoiled, stupid girl – very strong-minded, completely persuaded about her own worth, almost foolishly green. It seems she is emulating her namesake goddess, Diana or Artemis, and here comes her Orion. However, as Diana is no real deity, just a spoiled brat, she has no chance against him.

"She writhed in his arms as he crushed her to him in a sudden access of possessive passion. His head bent slowly down to her, his eyes burned deeper, and, held immovable, she endured the first kiss she had ever received.”

Yes, the time of comeuppance has come: according to Aubrey's brotherly wishes a brutally handsome sheik kidnapped our intrepid heroine as soon as she was left alone in the desert and decided to help her understand what women are really created for. Welcome to Middle Ages, ladies and gentlemen, prepare your whips, chastity belts and proceed. Things will turn ugly very soon.

“Her body was aching with the grip of his powerful arms, her mouth was bruised with his savage kisses. She clenched her hands in anguish. "Oh, God!" she sobbed, with scalding tears that scorched her cheeks. "Curse him! Curse him!"”



Indeed. As you can guess Diana had no other option than to endure the rape and feel bad afterwards but at least she was also offered a bath, a friendly Arab servant girl and a meal. Which made it almost ok, right? Ahmed ben Hassan was not a total beast or a caveman after all. You see, he could read and write and had an artistic soul - go figure...

“She was utterly in his power and at his mercy—the mercy of an Arab who was merciless.”

Ha! That’s the fate which, according to our authoress, befalls arrogant little fools who, being born just lowly girls, want to pretend they can be like boys or even like men who are, of course, the peak of creation, the epitome of all perfection and finesse! Read and learn, foolish creatures!

“She had paid heavily for the determination to ignore the restrictions of her sex laid upon her and the payment was not yet over.“

Here was Diane's problem - it was all her fault to begin with, for being too avant-garde. Of course her punishment wasn’t over. She sinned too much, cutting her hair short and going around in breeches, on her own day and night, smoking those cigarettes, bad, bad girl. Our authoress, showing a really cruel streak, decided to torment her victim further.



“And, according to his mood, he noticed or ignored her. He demanded implicit obedience to his lightest whim with the unconscious tyranny of one who had always been accustomed to command. (…)She was physically afraid of him, and she hated him and loathed herself for the fear he inspired. And her fear was legitimate. His strength was abnormal, and behind it was the lawlessness and absolutism that allowed free rein to his savage impulses. He held life and death in his hand.”

If you are bigger and stronger you can do everything and anything! Hell yeah, male dominance forever and sieg heil! Err… I mean, of course, how horrible! But it was her fault, she had it coming, right? All her fault! She provoked him!

“ With a start of recollection she realized fully whose arm was round her, and whose breast her head was resting on. Her heart beat with sudden violence. What was the matter with her? Why did she not shrink from the pressure of his arm and the contact of his warm, strong body? What had happened to her? Quite suddenly she knew—knew that she loved him, that she had loved him for a long time, even when she thought she hated him and when she had fled from him. She knew now why his face had haunted her in the little oasis at midday —that it was love calling to her subconsciously.”

Sigh and groan…why I am not surprised? Of course she had to fall in love with him – who wouldn’t? After the ruthless kidnapping, humiliations, imprisonment and a series of rapes she was being dragged endlessly through a desert; she had to love her torturer, right? He shot her horse before her own eyes and was flogging different men to show that when it came to punishment, girls and boys, Ahmed always meant business. Who wouldn’t fall in love with such a man?

“ He was a brute, but she loved him, loved him for his very brutality and superb animal strength. And he was an Arab! A man of different race and colour, a native; Aubrey would indiscriminately class him as a "damned nigger." She did not care. It made no difference.”

Moral elevation of a female mind through complete submission and a series of rapes. Please let me puke for a moment or two.

" He was an Arab, and to him a woman was a slave, and as a slave she must give everything and ask for nothing.”


Honestly, who needs emetics or purgatives with quotes like that?

And here comes the educated second opinion from a completely civilized French gentleman, a close friend of our Arab, who came for a visit and shared with Diane such a pearl of wisdom:

"Beautiful women, Madame," he said slowly, "unfortunately provoke in some men all that is basest and vilest in their natures. No man knows to what depths of infamy he may stoop under the stress of a sudden temptation."

It might be a favourite quote of, I believe, every heterosexual rapist on Earth. It conveys more or less their favourite message: women, the victims, are the real source of the evil. Without women men would be like a bunch of angels. Banish all women, especially those beautiful and young - no temptation, no crime, the world is a paradise.

“Sex had supervened to overthrow all her preconceived notions. The womanly instincts that under Aubrey's training had been suppressed and undeveloped had, in contact with the Sheik's vivid masculinity and compelling personality, risen to the surface with startling completeness.”

I beg your pardon? Since when a rapist and an aggressive control freak has a compelling personality? Since when forced sex can make you understand anything better? Now let me mourn Diana and this novel in silence. Such a big pile of stinking rubbish should rest in peace.

“Diane, Diane, my sunshine. The tent is cold and dark without you….Ibraheim Omair! That devil and Diane! Oh, Allah! Grant me time to get to her….How the jackals are howling….”

Typical. Only when she is abducted by another skeik and no longer available, her beloved Ahmed finally finds something nice to say to her and shows that he cares at all. Yawn. And of course since Lawrence of Arabia no sheik is a real sheik if he doesn’t have some British aristocratic blood in his veins hahaha. Nice touch about the jackals btw. Let them howl some more. I might join them out of sheer frustration.

Final verdict:

Heavens help me it is a 1919 book. It depicts an immature, bratty heroine being 'tamed' by a man who rapes her repeatedly and generally treats her like an object. This is exacerbated by the fact that she falls in love with her rapist, head over heels, and never wants to leave him – the fully fledged Stockholm syndrome with a dash of good old masochism. I would call this novel an ugly mother of the worst Harlequin romances. I don’t know much about psychology but it seems to me Ms. Hull really hated strong, independent women, I wonder why. Still she got her revenge no problem.

Was it worth reading? Hell, yes. It made me understand so many things. But look, madam, what you have done to the literature at large. Only look at this mess. You should be so ashamed of yourself.

All stills are taken from The Sheik, a 1921 American silent romantic drama film directed by George Melford and starring Rudolph Valentino, Agnes Ayres, and Adolphe Menjou.

ETA: check also the awesome discussion Heidenkind and I had some time ago

Review: Tigers & Devils (Tigers & Devils #1) by Sean Kennedy

Synopsis:
The most important things in Simon Murray’s life are football, friends, and film—in that order. His friends despair of him ever meeting someone, but despite his loneliness, Simon is cautious about looking for more. Then his best friends drag him to a party, where he barges into a football conversation and ends up defending the honour of star forward Declan Tyler—unaware that the athlete is present. In that first awkward meeting, neither man has any idea they will change each other's lives forever.

Like his entire family, Simon revels in living in Melbourne, the home of Australian Rules football and mecca for serious fans. There, players are treated like gods—until they do something to fall out of public favour. This year, the public is taking Declan to task for suffering injuries outside his control, so Simon's support is a bright spot.

But as Simon and Declan fumble toward a relationship, keeping Declan's homosexuality a secret from well-meaning friends and an increasingly suspicious media becomes difficult. Nothing can stay hidden forever. Soon Declan will have to choose between the career he loves and the man he wants, and Simon has never been known to make things easy—for himself or for others.

When I saw that this book was written in first person voice, I almost stopped reading it. I’m glad I persisted.

Simon Murray, a football fan, a film critic, and a gay man tells a story of how he fell in love with a football player. You’d think that the celebrity bit would define the story, and it does, up to a point. However, I found that the description of how Simon falls in love and embraces a meaningful relationship meant more than the external challenges of dating a celebrity who lives in another city in Tasmania—as opposed to in Melbourne—because it defines his character.

The protagonist and the narrator of this story isn’t an easy man. He’s flawed and difficult to his friends who know and love him despite his aloofness. Simon is terrified of commitment and at the same time it’s what he envies in others and wants desperately for himself even if he won’t admit it. He’s as stubborn as he’s loyal and he hides his insecurities behind his directness. Most people would find that off-putting but for Declan Tyler™ it’s refreshing to find someone not bending over backwards to please him. It’s Simon’s foul mouth that tempts the big scary footballer to risk exposure.

They experience a whirlwind romance with the full advantages and disadvantages of an illicit romance as well as face the challenges of a more established relationship. That is to say they get to meat the parents and other assorted friends. The story covers a period over eighteen months and shows how someone inured to single life struggles to open up and to let someone else to share his life in full. There are misunderstandings but not counting the final one they’re not treated as prolonged romance clichés but tackled and dealt with.

Although I’d classify Tigers & Devils as a modern gay fairytale, Kennedy doesn’t shy away from the darker side of being out and proud. Both Simon and Declan experience heckling and insults, but it’s never explicit. Neither are the sex scenes by the way. Things aren’t glossed over per se; the focus simply is on Simon’s personal growth and evolving relationships. You know, on the important things.

I liked how Kennedy used little things to illustrate Simon’s character. For example, the reader see all the characters through Simon’s eyes and gets only the information he thinks is important about the people he meets. That is why the reader is as shocked to learn the reason for the other WAGs shunning Lisa as Simon is. Having said that, the adverbs were killing me. And the ending felt a tad drawn-out.

The Kingmakers (Vampire Empire #3) by Clay Griffith, Susan Griffith

Book info:
Form: pdf format, e-book
Genre: steampunk with vampires
Target audience: YA

Synopsis (from Goodreads):

The epic Vampire Empire trilogy rushes to a conclusion of honor and love, hatred and vengeance, sacrifice and loss. A war to the death. Empress Adele has launched a grand crusade against the vampire clans of the north. Prince Gareth, the vampire lord of Scotland, serves the Equatorian cause, fighting in the bloody trenches of France in his guise as the dashing Greyfriar. But the human armies are pinned down, battered by harsh weather and merciless attacks from vampire packs. To even the odds, Adele unleashes the power of her geomancy, a fearsome weapon capable of slaughtering vampires in vast numbers. However, the power she expends threatens her own life even as she questions the morality of such a weapon. As the war turns ever bloodier and Adele is threatened by betrayal, Gareth faces a terrible choice. Their only hope is a desperate strike against the lord of the vampire clans-Gareth's brother, Cesare. It is a gamble that could win the war or signal the final days of the Greyfriar.

My impressions:

It wasn't a bad ending of a series but also one which left me a bit disappointed and strangely detached. I would call it an ending of lost potential. Perhaps it's been too long between this one and part 2. Who knows.

My first carping: a big epic showdown should be anything but slow. This one was slow. I expected battles, strategy and wartime mayhem, a whirlwind of activity I got pages and pages devoted to single battles, Adele’s angst over the Greyfriar and the difficulties in their relationship. Pages and pages of the Greyfriar’s own angst – about everything not exactly connected to the ongoing war. I think everything that happened and everything anyone felt in this book had to be accompanied by a rather long winded internal monologue, sometimes but not always switching to a dialogue.

Many of these scenes weren’t bad – like Gareth visiting the King of Paris (a nice scene but also one that ended up pretty irrelevant so hardly mattered in the end), or Gareth cooking for Adele. Adele re-uniting with Morgana. Adele talking with Sanah. Anhalt sparring with Senator Clark. Senator Clark’s war in the US. They were all good scenes, albeit overly written with too much monologue, but they were great in their own right for character development and exploration and just plain fun with this world and these people who I enjoy. But they weren’t relevant to the plot – if they were removed the ending would be exactly the same as it was with them. It did seem as if glue, holding the whole novel together, was too weak or simply forgotten.

Gareth was just a bore, there was nothing to him except for his love for Adele. Adele was supposed to mature and become a kick-ass empress which she did to some extend but also she could be surprisingly annoying. I didn't understand why she kept questioning whether she should use her powers to kill the vampires despite the fact that 1) they were evil, most of them 2) they were responsible for millions of deaths and planned even more slaughter 3) they wanted to enslave humanity 4) they did nothing, literally nothing to persuade her and other humans otherwise. I suppose her defense of the vampires was meant to make her seem forgiving and compassionate but it just made her look like a dumb empress who wore her heart on her sleeve permanently, being the one and only person with super powers around enamoured with a real VAMPIRE who happened to be a decent guy and love her back.

Never mind that the future of humanity was in her hands, never mind that humans were dropping dead. None of that mattered if it hurt her centuries old lover (?). Everything seemed to fall into place too easily. Adele reads some doodles and realizes she's the most powerful geomancer in the world at a time when all seems lost. A little too deus ex machina for my taste. All of the planning went nowhere, Adele saves the day and Gareth is immune to her geomancy now and they will be together and all ugly baddies who count are just killed, killed, killed. It served them right perhaps but it was also boring. No subtlety, no wits and no scheming. No compromises either.

Final verdict:

I expected this series to be better. I wanted this series to be better. Unfortunately I was a bit delusional about my expectations. I liked the first book the best, the second was weak and the last one was just so-so.

Rameau's Review Archive: Heart of the Druid Laird by Barbara Longley

Rameau's ramblings: Originally posted on Goodreads on November 17th 2011.

Synopsis:
Cursed with immortality, Dermot MacKay craves death. To lift the faerie curse placed upon him and his men over 1,600 years ago, he must return the soul of his reincarnated wife to the exact place and time of her murder. But her soul is currently residing in the very modern Sidney St. George--and first he has to convince her to accompany him to Scotland.

Sidney doesn't believe Dermot's wild claims of immortality and rebirth, yet she cannot deny that she is drawn to the sexy Scot. Nor can she explain the sense of deja vu his touch elicits. Desperate for answers, she agrees to go with him--only to learn too late that to help the man she loves is to lose him forever...


Heart of the Druid Laird by Barbara Longley


Critique should always have both good and bad points. I'll try.

The premise looked so promising. Although, I'm not a fan of fairies in general I thought this just might be the book to change my mind, and in that Heart of the Druid Laird succeeded. The fairies were easily the best part of this book.

See, it's working. Good news comes first and there's more.

I also really liked the structure of the plot. The author obviously knows how to plan events ahead while to give herself some room for manoeuvring. All the plot twists were well set up and logical and the pacing was decent. There were no out of the blue surprises behind the corners, but there was that telltale glow that warns about a speeding car.

And I really enjoyed Tommy and Zoe and their little side romance. They made the perfect addition so as not to burden the main couple with too much of the background reveal. Info dump nicely avoided and a golden star to the author.

Unfortunately, this was it. Now on to the bad.

Let's start with the ridiculous. For a while now I've been aware of the fact that historical fiction is just that, fiction. As much as I'd like to think all men of old were nearly two metres tall and build like muscle towers, I know they weren't. Their nutritional status wouldn't have allowed it. I can suspend belief for one or three exceptionally well-built historical heroes at the time and enjoy the fluffy romance while they swoop their tiny, fragile heroines of their feet. But there's a limit to this good will of mine, and that limit is five. I find five 1650-year-old, extra tall hunks walking down the street in formation ridiculous. When the number is upped to thirteen, it becomes absurd.

Shall we move on to the language then? Longley didn't overdo the Scottish accent apart from a handful of lines in dialogue, but the little touches she chose to use to imply the accent didn't work well for me. I stumbled over every single no' (not) even when I managed to get through the lines of heavier brogue.

This, however, was not my pet peeve. That honour falls on the cursing with all the effings and soddings and such. For majority of the book everyone acts like their mother is eavesdropping just behind the corner ready to rap them on the knuckles for saying a rude word. Then when things get tense and the climax approaches they suddenly start dropping asses, arses, and shits. A few pages later, after the threat has been resolved, they go back to being prissy. Continuity, this book has none.

None of these little mishaps are as dire failure as is the utterly bollocksed characterisation. I'm at a loss what to make of these characters. They continuously say and claim to think one thing, and then go on acting in the exact opposite manner. Dermot is supposed to get Sidney to Scotland to lift the curse and not get tangled up and hurt the girl's feelings, but he promptly starts wooing her. Later on, he blames her for distracting him before he could tell her the truth, which, might I add, would have simplified the plot substantially. She's supposed to be this hard boiled single woman who doesn't date or even look at a man twice, but she melts into a puddle of goo just from looking at him. You can imagine the level of sexual attraction when he starts to speak.

Yeah, not so much. Didn't work for me. Sidney's crying fits and whiplash reactions to the truth (once finally shared with her) make her the first character to earn a place on my new vapid-insipid-divas-and-ingénues shelf. Until her, I hadn't felt tempted enough to make one.

The bad characterisation extends to Zoe and David, Sidney's friend, and brother, who basically act like a deus ex machina to get the unhappy couple together. Aside from Tommy, the muscle gang doesn't win in the personality lotto. Lachlan gets closest with few hits.

What really ends up killing this book for me, though, is the manufactured drama. With a set up like this, a reincarnation, a cursed immortality, and a choice between loving and letting go, there's no need for all the fights originated from miscommunication. Dermot and Sidney have enough on their plate with a fairy princess and their growing feelings for each other interfering with the lifting of the curse, so they don't really need to be getting their wires crossed too.

A good critique should always end up on a positive note.

I can't complain about the grammar or editing.


You can also read this review on Sandra's My Reading Nook-blog.

I received a copy of this book from the publisher through NetGalley.

Movie review: Children of Men by Alfonso Cuaron

Genre: dystopian horror
Directed by Alfonso Cuaron
Cast:
Theo Faron - Clive Owen
Julian Taylor  - Julianne Moore
Kee  - Clare-Hope Ashitey 

Miriam - Pam Ferris
Jasper Palmer - Michael Caine

Synopsis:


Year 2027. For unknown reasons human women have been infertile for almost two decades and the youngest citizen of Earth, a 18-year-old boy, has just been murdered. That situation has left society on the brink of total collapse. The UK soldiers on although hordes of dirty illegal immigrants seek sanctuary there; that's why the last functioning government imposes opressive immigration laws and sends soldiers on the streets.

 Theo Faron, a civil servant one day is abducted by a terrorist group called the Fishes. He is  asked by their leader,  his ex-wife Julian, a human rights activist, to help a West African refugee called Kee escape the overwhelming chaos. Soon enough he finds out that Kee is pregnant - perhaps the only pregnant woman on Earth. Will they manage to saver her and her baby? Will it change the desperate situation of the humankind?

My impressions:

I don't know why but I didn't want to watch this movie for years. Officially everything was fine : plenty of people said it was an awesome story directed by a well-known, sensible guy and it did win a lot of awards; the premise sounded nice enough (I like dystopias), the cast was interesting...and yet I couldn't force myself to borrow it somehow or muster enough interest to watch it. Untill this year. My personal impressions after seeing it are mixed.

The plot was really good, realistic and gripping. I found out that the movie is based in broad outline on the 1992 dystopian novel by P. D. James about a world suffering from global infertility — and written with a nod to Orwell. It definitely made itself felt.

The action was swift and ferocious, the setting - an urban hell that looked chillingly similar to the Iraqi or Palestinian combat areas of newspaper reportage, television news and mostly uncensored documentaries. There were several heart-gripping set pieces, including a hugely unsettling ambush scene shot almost entirely from inside a car crammed with passengers. There’s so much despair and anger and grief packed into this film that after a while I stopped understanding how Kee could be saved at all and, what's maybe more important, what for. One human woman, no matter how fertile, and one baby cannot save the whole humanity, right? Even if they are supported by a powerful shadowy organization and represent something akin to a new Messiah and his mom.

There are great scenes and clever touches, don't get me wrong - like the ancient, manky sweatshirt Theo wears -advertising the London Olympics of 2012. To many people, it is a symbol of London's last-ever demonstration of untroubled national rejoicing, before that mood was cruelly shattered by the 7/7 bombings. Now London 2012 is Theo's veteran-badge of despair, and a memento of his lost career in political dissent and the drab existence he leads.

It seemed to me that Cuarón wanted to make a movie that condenses many of our fears and anxieties of today: brutal, over-controlling governments, the public’s willingness to cede hard-won freedoms for just semblance of law and order, our own relationship as a species to our environment -- and deploys them in a story that’s close enough to reality to feel like a kick in the gut and fictional enough to make us (hopefully) take a step back and say, 'hey, are we doing the right thing?'

Did he succeed? Not really, at least not in my case. What this movie lacks, in my very humble opinion, is a clearer purpose. I have to admit a mission to ferry a young girl who may represent a new beginning for humanity (how? why? it is never explored either) to a mysterious organization called the Human Project seemed to me as senseless as all those endless, brutal scenes of fighting and persecution of the immigrants. If you asked me they would fail, all of them - for more than one reason.

Final verdict:

This is an explosively violent future-nightmare thriller, which might leave you drained and miserable. The thinking person's action movie? Yes, but strangely devoid of any purpose and therefore depressing, not offering any real, tangible hope.

The death of the Borgias

Three years and it’s over. Done before its time. But as in the time of the Borgia Pope, money still makes the world go around and the network executives rather keep the coins in their pockets rather than bless their parishioners with two more hours of Vatican splendour from five hundred years ago.

Spoilers! Spoilers for all three seasons of The Borgias.


The Borgias isn’t an easy show to watch, but it’s an easy show to love. Or hate. It marches out a slew of historical figures and twists their lives and events into a fictitious plot barely resembling historical accounts. It’s the gossip rags of the sixteen hundreds brought to alive. There’s sex and corruption, murder and mayhem, and it’s all centred around one family. The original crime family as I’ve seen some say.

The real portrait of Rodrigo Borgia

You have Jeremy Irons playing Rodrigo Borgia, a cardinal who buys his way into the highest office on earth in 1492 and becomes Pope Alexander VI. He’s a pragmatist with ambition for himself and his family… and supposedly the show revolves around him. After three years (well two years and three season) of watching the show my recollection of Irons’ part in the show is very vague. There was the lechery, the greed, and a hint of religious fervor but all in all his portrayal is bland. Is role as Pope Alexander VI is insipid enough to utterly escape my memory. There’s even a brilliant scene in the show explaining the actor’s likeness—or lack thereof—to the original but other than that I couldn’t really tell you what makes Rodrigo Borgia tick. Delusions of grandeur perhaps.

The Pope and all his ladies...

And I think the show runners realised this because as much as the show—and the history—relies on the father Borgia, the show focuses on his children Cesare (François Arnaud), Juan (David Oakes), and Lucrezia (Holliday Grainger), who are pawns to their father’s ambition. Their mother, Vanozza Cattaneo played by Joanne Whalley barely flickers on the screen other than to offer a few sage advice to her children and to throw a fit when Rodrigo claims he must embrace celibacy for his new office and then promptly proceeds to take on a new mistress.

Cesare in particular is the nexus of people and alliances. He yearns for a career in the military but his father has other plans for him and this fuels Cesare’s troubled relationship with his brother. Their mutual jealousy that dominates the familiar interactions just as Cesare’s incestuous love for his sister provides the long plot for the show. Neil Jordan and co. take the time to build that delicate relationship showing care guiding the characters to where the story must take them. There are no justifications, just reasons that make it understandable.

The real Lucrezia Borgia

Holliday Grainger transforms from the young and naive fourteen year old into a shining, independent woman (as much as that was possible around that time) who even brings a French King to his knees. Figuratively. In all her pain and happiness, it’s Lucrezia who seduces her beloved brother because only he can fulfil her every need. It’s her who crosses the line, if there ever was a line between them.


Even with all these delicious connections and the underlying political machinations Cesare operates for his father, the most interesting character in the series is Micheletto played by Sean Harris. He is Cesare’s henchman, his loyal assassin, and a man who kills even himself for his Lord.

From the beginning where Cesare turns his would be killer into a loyal servant, the chemistry between François Arnaud and Sean Harris is what kept me riveted to the show. Seemingly for no other reason than that he feels like it, Micheletto decides to make Cesare the focus of his life. Thus everything that is important to Cesare becomes important to Micheletto and he’s willing to suffer tremendous pain to keep his master’s secrets.

It’s love at first sight. Quite literally. The show never says it explicitly, but considering Micheletto’s background  revealed in the second season (which differs greatly from the historical accounts) and his short love affair with one of Leonardo da Vinci’s models, Pascal (Charlie Carrick), it’s quite obvious that Cesare is the love of Micheletto’s life. And certain scenes after Micheletto’s departure make me think that love isn’t quite as one sided as Micheletto believes.

Although, I’m fixating on Cesare as the catalyst for the relationships and the political intrigue of the show, I have very little to say about his character. Almost as little as I had to say about his father. Maybe that is because after Juan’s death, Cesare becomes somewhat an aloof figure. He starts his long journey down to the pits of hell and step by step he’s determined to reach his destination.

Only we never get to see him get there. The ending of The Prince leaves many questions unanswered, but I have to wonder if it’s not for the best. If not only implying to the imminent doom is a more powerful closure to this story that began from the middle than witnessing a rushed montage of characters succumbing to their deaths in faraway lands and absent from Rome. It might even be a better ending than Pope Alexander IV being denied absolution on his deathbed.


I’m going to miss this show.

Review: The Riven Kingdom (Godspeaker 02) and Hammer of God (Godspeaker 03) by Karen Miller

Synopsis (from Goodreads):

The Riven Kingdom 02:

The King of Ethrea is dying. His only surviving heir is the Princess Rhian. But if her enemies have their way, Ethrea will not be ruled by a woman.

Dexterity Jones is a toymaker. To protect Princess Rhian and his country, he must place his trust in an exile from Mijak. Yet, as Ethrea comes ever closer to civil war, a greater danger awaits.

Across the sea, an Empress has already slaughtered millions in the name of her god. And the war will not end -until the world kneels before her.

Hammer of God 03:

In Ethrea, Rhian sits upon a precarious throne. Defiant dukes who won't accept her rule threaten the stability of her kingdom. Dexterity has been banished from her court in disgrace. The blue-haired slave Zandakar, the man she thought was her friend, has been revealed as the son of a woman sworn to destroy her world. And Rhian's husband, King Alasdair, is unsure of her love.

The trading nations refuse to believe Mijak is a threat, and promise reprisals if she dares protect her realm. Only Emperor Han of mysterious Tzhung-tzhungchai knows that the danger from Mijak is real.

But is he an ally, or an enemy in disguise? As she struggles to learn the truth, and keep her embattled crown, the murderous warhost of Mijak advances ...

My impressions:

I admit that after reading Empress (reviewed by me a bit earlier) I waited for the continuation of the series with very high expectations. I wanted to find out about the fates of Zandakar and his half-brother Dmitrak, not to mention their mother, Hekat, a psychopat who was very interesting to read about. I also was intrigued by the promise of other, less violent and bloody characters, more civilized and definitely more likeable, like Rhian, the unwilling queen-warrior, Dexterity Jones, the toymaker turned a prophet, Alastair, the King consort and proud of it, and Ursa, the healer. Unfortunately as soon as I started reading the second part I felt as if I was cheated and given a book from a quite different series. 

Please don't get me wrong - I don't mean here I missed the  cruel scenes, full of slaughter, blood drinking, scorpions stinging and other sadistic punishment. I didn't miss Hekat and her unrelented egotism. I missed an interesting character development and a plot which would make me forget the world around me and keep reading no matter what. I missed heroes and heroines which actually made sense and were funny. I was prepared to like the series, really. Unfortunately the novels let me down.

Overall my impressions can be summed up this way (spoilers ahead!):

Rhian: Yee-haaaw, I am the Queen now! Oh, what a handsome stranger with blue eyes, blue hair and perfect musculature! So tall and mysterious and...I WANT! Oooups...I've just married  Alastair, my childhood friend, now a completely plain man and a bore...I WANT!

Dexterity Jones: His name is Zandakar, my Queen, I bought him off a slaver and his past hides a lot of ugly secrets I know but can't divulge. He also wields a knife like an artist, just watch him dance his hotas! 

Rhian: I WANT! 

Zandakar: Zho!

 (they dance close to each other but the tension  never increases, go figure... or maybe it means *hint, hint, wink, wink, nudge, nudge* that they are not meant to be together? Like not even one kiss will be exchanged? Eh...life...)

Alastair, the freshly married King consort: You can't trust that Zandakar, Rhian! He looks at you in a completely inappropriate way and he is wayyyy too handsome and too dangerous! Stop it immediately! Don't trust him! 

Rhian: I don't trust him at all, dear hubby, fear not! *silently* I WANT!  
(she returns to the hotas and her muscled teacher and they dance together).

Dexterity Jones: How can you not trust him? 

*silently* 

Yes, he used to be a mass murderer and a war criminal but look, now he is repenting, as docile as a lamb!

*louder* 

By the way we need him very badly, I know it from the best source, my late wife! We will be attacked soon and he is our only chance!

Zandakar: Zho! 

Rhian: Right, now I understand: we need him and I WANT! 

The chorus of ambassadors and soldiers:

 We dooon't truuuuust Zandakar, we dooon't truuuuuust Zandakar, we dooon't truuuuust Zandakar!!!

Zandakar: Wei? Tcha!

Rhian: Wei? Tcha! I mean you don't trust him? How could you? He is our only chance, we need him and we must trust him a little bit! *dances the hotas with Zandakar again*

Alastair, the King consort: No, no, no, we don't need him and you can't trust him, dear wife! Get away from him!  Dance with me! 

Rhian: But you can't dance dear hubby! *dances with Zandakar some more*

The chorus of ambassadors and soldiers:

 We dooon't truuuuust Zandakar, we doooon't truuuuuust Zandakar, we dooon't truuuuust Zandakar!!!

Zandakar: Wei!?!? *he slashes his arm and swears on his blood that he can be trusted. Unfortunately almost nobody understands*.

Rhian: Oh, look, he's sworn a blood oath! I trust him, not completely but a tiny little bit more, anyway enough to keep him very close by, my kingdom needs him and I WANT! *dances her hotas with Zandakar*.

Dexterity Jones: Awww, look at them two together! They are so clearly in love with each other! And they fit together! What a pity she is married and he is a mass murderer and a war criminal who most probably cannot be trusted...

Rhian: WHAT?!?! Why nobody told me that much earlier? Now I am addicted to him and his hotas and I WANT! What I am supposed to do?

The chorus of ambassadors and soldiers:

 We dooon't truuuuust Zandakar, we dooon't truuuuuust Zandakar, we dooon't truuuuust Zandakar!!!

Zandakar: Tcha! *he dances with his knife even quicker to prove his point and Rhian, after a while, dances with him. You see, she has some knights to kill*.

Alastair the King consort: *cries*

booo...my wife doesn't love me anymore and we don't even have a child! Not to mention the fact that a powerful army of heathen barbarians is attacking us mercilessly, led by Zandakar's mommy dearest and his sociopath brother...boooo... Zandakar, save us!

The chorus of ambassadors and soldiers:

 We dooon't truuuuust Zandakar, we dooon't truuuuuust Zandakar, we dooon't truuuuust Zandakar!!!

Dexterity Jones: No problemo, Your Highness, we will be saved or I'll eat my wooden toys! Just let Zandakar find out who his real dad is, kill his closest family and all will be peachy! 

Zandakar: Zho! *he kills his brother, Dmitrak, who had killed Vortka, Zandakar's real dad, and his mum so he surely should have died long time ago and nobody would cry a lot, right?*

Rhian: Hurray, we are free! Unfortunately I can't think of my personal happiness anymore because Zandakar must gather his people and lead them back to their horrible country and I am the local Queen...oh, only hotas will remain with me, keeping me warm and fuzzy...and I must stay with my  Alastair...ugly, boring Alastair...*she cries and cries and cries*....ZANDAKAR, I WANT!!!

Alastair the King consort: HA! *he looks askance at his wife and then rubs his hands, very pleased with himself*.

Zandakar: Zho! *He takes his people and boards a ship. Then he waits.*.

Dexterity Jones: Oh, fine, I can return to whittling my wooden toys...and of course I am going with Zandakar. He is a widower, I am a widower, he's lost his love, I've lost my love, he isn't mad about ladies, I am not mad about ladies, he is well-built, I am nimble with my fingers...

Rhian: WHAT?!?! *she looks at them wide-eyed and shakes head* You can't trust anybody nowadays...

THE END.

Final verdict:

It seems to me that after writing the first, relatively good part of Godspeaker Karen Miller got really scared. She started a Dark Fantasy series full of blood, abuse, torture and psychos, yikes! Then she decided to improve that without any further ado and penned two following books with far nicer characters: fluffy, kinder, civilized and completely boring. She also successfully emasculated the poor son of Hekat and tamed that bitch Empress as well. Tcha! The result is not impressive to say the least of it.